Stuff I Got Wrong ⛔️

The purpose of this page is to proactively share ways I have changed my thinking over time. The best thinkers change their minds when presented with new information. I like to think I’m a decent thinker, so I change my mind when presented with new information only sometimes. πŸ€”

To be proactive, I’ve cancelled myself thanks to Scott Adams– this is his template that I’ve copied verbatim as a joke that’s also not quite a joke.

Being Human- There’s a bunch of stuff that I don’t know I get wrong. Luckily, we humans can and do evolve. Some things may come off as crude! I am a crude, unenlightened student of life. I tend to err towards the side of practicing not getting offended rather than worrying about offending everyone. If I said something that offended you, please know that it’s not my intent, and use it as an opportunity for self-examination. Anytime I can take things out of the bucket of “stuff that pisses me off” it’s a victory. 🧬

Being Catholic– I used to be Catholic. I’m not saying all Catholics are by definition bad/wrong/evil, but consent doesn’t count if it’s not informed consent. I made a lifetime commitment to the church as an 8th grader, without having any understanding of what that truly meant. Further, I became Catholic by nature of birth, not by conscious choice. Let’s not throw out the baby with the bathwater. The church does have many benefits and gets a lot of things right. ✝️

Judging things as binary– Life is mostly non-binary. As a therapist once told me, “Drew, you have a higher than average desire for justice.” This caused me to be blind to nuance and judge almost everything as true/false, right/wrong, yes/no, black/white, or other booleans. Now I’m nearly the opposite, viewing many things as spectrums. 🌈

Wearing Sunglasses– Check my notes on Health and Light by John Ott for a better understanding of the reversal. I don’t intend to wear these ever again. UV light is beneficial, and our eyes become extra sensitive to light when we are starved of it. Just like binge drinking isn’t healthy, sun binging isn’t either. Regular sun exposure, hats, and resilience can prevent the need for sunglasses. πŸ•Ά

Playing small- For a long time I simply didn’t believe in myself nor did I believe that it was possible to have things I want, so I didn’t try. Sure, sometimes I’d try, but I’d rarely give a full effort. This is a crippling belief and getting free from it made a world of difference. I don’t always get what I want, but I get it a lot more often when I go for it. πŸ€Ύβ€β™‚οΈ

Having money as my enemy- I used to think that anyone who got rich had to be evil, so I deliberately avoided that. Of course, this caused me to be poor, which made me just as obsessed, if not more, than rich people. The reframe I’ve used instead is how can I earn a living in a way that aligns with my values? πŸ’°

Having enemies- I’ve been free from this for a while but remember how much harder things were when I wasn’t, especially around the time of middle or high school. I may be someone’s enemy, but I have no enemies of my own. I genuinely believe that everyone thinks they are the good guys, and those who commit wrongdoings are misinformed, committing unconscious wounds. It gets a bit Christian to think that way…forgive them, Father, for they know not what they do. 🀺